“Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” (NIV) Colossians 4:6
As is true of most young boys, I took cues on forming my values by watching my dad. He was a businessman, a good one, who worked hard to provide for his family. His approach was straightforward, direct, firm…what people would term “no nonsense.”
He was not a person without compassion. If a drifter tried to bum some money, Dad would offer to buy him a meal, but not cash that might fuel some vice.
Throughout high school and college years, I worked for a succession of independent businessmen who owned a market, a fast food restaurant, a service station, and a carpet cleaning business. Each knew that to survive, to prosper, their approach needed to be straightforward, direct, firm…they would “tell it like it is.”
When I took my first fulltime job in a ministry, I took with it this “businessman’s mindset.” I wanted to do everything by the book, because that was how I had seen people achieve success. When an issue arose that I felt would cost our ministry money, I was not prepared to be flexible. As tension increased, the other party said, “Well, I can certainly tell that things have changed there. You can be sure this is the last time we’ll work together.” My response was straightforward, direct, and firm as I succinctly told them how our ministry would survive after their departure.
Well, there’s nothing like getting into trouble to change one’s behavior. But did that change my values…did that overcome the business-like influences from my entire life? Not initially. But not much later a mentor shared with me Colossians 4:6, and for years I’ve tried, with varying degrees of success, to fill my conversation with grace.
Having grace-filled conversation does not mean that we allow people to walk over us, that we don’t object when we are wronged, or that we don’t speak up for our faith when challenged. But I have other, sometimes more subtle difficulties speaking with grace. Have you ever tired to elevate yourself by putting someone else down? Or, how about going for the quick laugh at the expense of another? Have you fueled a negative conversation instead of putting an end to it? Yup, guilty here too.
Why do you think the Bible uses the analogy of “seasoned with salt?” Salt does two things: it makes things more savory and, in those pre-refrigeration days, it was used as a preservative that kept things from getting stinky! Should we desire to have our conversation have better flavor and to be less stinky?
Father, help there to be less of me, and more of You, in my heart. Help me to know how to answer everyone in a way that is pleasing to you. Remind me to seek grace-filled conversation. Amen.
